


Worth 1000 Words

by JJBATrash



Category: Fate/Grand Order
Genre: Other, but like also too much, fate gives me so much inspiration it's insane, had to pare down to my absolute favorites which was surprisingly easy, i mostly just want to make my cute carmilla blushy blushy, then do something with them which was a lot harder, trying out a new fandom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-31
Updated: 2019-07-09
Packaged: 2019-12-29 19:34:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18300599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JJBATrash/pseuds/JJBATrash
Summary: Elizabeth Bathory teams up with her adult counterpart Carmilla for an unlikely adventure that just might make the two hate each other less.





	1. Always Turn the Sound Off

**Author's Note:**

> Insert something about how I haven't written in a couple of years so be patient as I get my skill back, also I've moved fandoms to Fate. I'll do something JJBA again when something inspires me to.
> 
> Also important note: Elizabeth and Carmilla are the only constant Servants to appear. Any other tagged Servants are relevant for only one chapter. I'll list which Servants are in which chapter, in case you just want to read their section. (Growing list until the fic is complete)
> 
> Ch. 4: Minamoto no Raikou appears  
> Ch. 5: Mata Hari and Shuten-Douji appear

The sun rose on a peaceful day in Chaldea. Just a mere week ago, the being known as Goetia, who had been masquerading as King Solomon, was defeated, and his Humanity Incineration Plan was thwarted. The Last Master of humanity was afforded some respite, and so too were their Servants.

Elizabeth Bathory rose with a start. She had been sleeping in, jolted awake by the ray of sunlight filtering through her window, the thin beam shining right onto her eyelids. Sitting up with a start, the red-haired would-be idol rubbed her eyes sleepily, before rising slowly from her plush animal covered mattress. Shuffling over to her vanity mirror, Elizabeth yawned before setting about doing her makeup.

About an hour later, the draconic idol left her room, humming to herself as she cantered down the hallway. Her thoughts were elsewhere other than her surroundings, until the sensation of bumping into someone snapped her back to reality. Blearily blinking, the young girl looked up to see who failed to get out of her way, when...

Two cold, golden eyes glared down at her, pearlescent pale hair cascading down and along an almost glowing white face. Yet for all her bright features no warmth came from the woman. Chains rattled lightly as the towering woman dusted off her dress from the impact.

“Watch yourself, welp.” Carmilla said with a cold edge in her voice.

Normally Elizabeth would have a retort for her older counterpart, but today something seemed... off, about her. She only nodded and quickly darted down the hallway, past the vampire. It was only when she reached the mess hall that she felt safe enough to stop power walking, letting her chest rise and fall rapidly with quick, short breaths.

A short, tense meal later, and no sight of her friend Nero to take her mind off, Elizabeth made her way back to her room, the sound of the sliding door hissing closed behind her. She threw off her heels, made her way to her bed, and...

There was Carmilla.

Sleeping on _her_ bed.

Clutching _her_ stuffed bear.

Elizabeth was first dumbfounded, then confused, then amused, and quickly looked about to ensure there was no one secretly filming this. Taking her phone from her pocket with a grin, she steadied the camera until it focused on the woman’s sleeping form. Kiyohime would get such a chuckle out of seeing the severe and intimidating countess like this.

SNAP! Went the shutter, and immediately Elizabeth’s little heart stopped. She stood stock still, as a deer does when a branch is snapped underfoot nearby. Surveying the room to see if she would need to run, she couldn’t tell whether one minute or an hour passed in the stillness.

Then...

“Did you get my good side? Fuhuhu...” came the low voice of her older version from... behind her? But, Elizabeth had been watching the whole time! How did...?

“Presence concealment, remember? An Assassin can move unnoticed, especially when her prey is panicked like you are...”

A bead of sweat rolled down Bathory’s brow and along her cheek before falling off her chin to the ground. So this is how it ends, she thought to herself... She didn’t even flinch when her phone was snatched out of her hands. Whatever her punishment was to be, she would face it head on, like a real idol would!

“Phantom Maiden...” Elizabeth winced slightly at the name of Carmilla’s Noble Phantasm. She could almost hear the large iron maiden approaching to take her in its cold, painful embrace now...!

Now...! Now! Now...? Elizabeth forced herself to stop holding her eyes shut, and saw that nothing had changed. Her confused look elicited a small noblewomanly laugh from the white haired woman.

“Normally, I would not hesitate to do so. But, luckily for you, I have a need for you, and this particular photo you stole of me.” She said, wagging the phone in her hand with a smirk.

Elizabeth looked hard at Carmilla. What was she planning?


	2. An Unusual Proposal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carmilla wants something from her younger self, something she only had in her youth.

Elizabeth’s leg bounced up and down as she sat at the edge of her bed, watching her adult form pacing back and forth with the occasional glare towards her. The blue eyed idol swallowed her nerves again and again. Surely she wouldn’t be attacked, right? Their shared Master wouldn’t appreciate one of her Servants harming another. At the very least, she thought, her skills as a Lancer made her necessary!

Watching Carmilla slowly walk back and forth with heavy, punctuating clicks of her heels in otherwise silence, made her imagination run. What if she was planning something awful? Like the other girls in her legend... What was she thinking about? Her adult version was so cold and so calculating, none of the vivacity or enthusiasm that Bathory herself possessed to be found.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity of chilled silence, the white haired countess spoke.

“You. You know what is considered desirable in certain contexts, correct? After all, you surely aren’t wearing that ridiculous outfit simply to hurt my eyes, I should hope...”

Elizabeth looked down at her pinstripe pink and red idol costume with a pout. She loved this outfit, it manifested when her full potential was reached, thanks to her bond and her time in battle alongside Master. To hear her older self hate it... despite not liking Carmilla, her opinion on it hurt. If she is Elizabeth’s future, indeed... then that means she would come to hate this dress. But she loved it so now...!

“Answer me.”

The draconic idol snapped back to attention, setting aside her thoughts on her attire and trying not to retort about Carmilla’s own... unique look. Barely any clothes on, mostly a big cape and chains down her whole body, a weird scary mask and a big staff... what was she thinking? Her hair looked nice though. And admittedly, the rare instances she’s seen Carmilla without her mask, her golden eyes, though cold and almost always malicious when directed at Elizabeth, evoked a sort of awe.

“Yeah, I do! As an idol, I know all about what’s cute and—”

“Good. As much as I don’t want to ask you for anything, it’s not like anyone else here in Chaldea has an idea about it. So you’re my only option and I have no choice. Got it? It’s simple process of elimination.”

Carmilla usually wasn’t so adamant about making sure only one motive was clear. The 14 year old wasn’t a genius, but she wasn’t stupid, either. She couldn’t help a bit of a smug grin from pulling on her lips as she replied.

“So, then, what exactly do you need my cute expertise for, Carmilla~?”

The countess looked flustered, a first for Elizabeth. With an audible “tch!” and a quick turn so her back was facing Elizabeth, Carmilla said, quietly, “I want Master to see me.”

“What was that?”

“You heard what I said!” Carmilla whipped around, anger put on display to cover her embarrassment.

“You want Master to... see you? You know you can just go up to her then, right?” Clearly the young girl was having too much fun at her adult counterpart’s expense.

A moment of silence and stillness save for Bathory’s slight bouncing on her bed. Finally, when the countess decided to rejoin the conversation, she said simply,

“I want Master to think I’m cute too.”

Elizabeth’s eyes widened at hearing that. The Blood Countess, she who struck fear and awe into those around her, whose gaze could pierce into a person’s heart and whose appetite included all the blood in a person’s body, wanted to be cute?

It was enough to make the girl laugh. Her counterpart didn’t find the amusement.

“And just what is that reaction supposed to mean? You think I can’t be cute, huh? Don’t make me use Phanto—”

Elizabeth waved her hand dismissively.

“Don’t be like that. You know I don’t mean to be rude. It’s just... I never thought I would hear you say that. But don’t you worry, the magical super dragon idol Eli-chan is here to help you!” She said as she stood from the bed, offering a broad smile to Carmilla.

A simple nod, and the countess strode toward the door.

“Then, tomorrow. Meet me in the simulation chamber and we will go from there.”

The door opened and Carmilla paused in the doorway, turning her gaze back toward Elizabeth.

“And you come _alone_. Tell a soul, and I will drain everything from you.”

The room felt a little cold again as the door closed behind her.

Elizabeth also just realized Carmilla never actually gave her phone back to her.


	3. It's Gonna Be A Long Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> E: "Operation: Cutemilla is a go!"  
> C: ".........is this really going to work?"  
> E: "With an operation name like that, it can't go wrong!"  
> C: "I'm doomed......."

The simulation chamber was cold and abnormally dark. Even for simulations that took place in cavernous expanses, Elizabeth’s dragonlike eyes could make out shapes, silhouettes, something. But here... something was different. The dark was... heavy? As though it were not mere shadow. Indeed, it felt more like a thick mist that overtook the room rather than simple absence of light... in this mind fogging darkness, she felt consumed by something far more sinister than herself. Except...

“Good of you to appear. You are alone, I take it?”

Golden leering eyes pierced the pitch like malicious talons striking out of the dark. Elizabeth nearly jolted. The sheer force that her adult self exuded...!

“Y-yeah, I’m alone. What’s with the theatrics, Carmilla?” she said, her face indignant but her tone belying her anxiety.

The vampiress stepped from the shadow, her form slowly taking on more definition and light as she stared her younger self down. The air began to feel less heavy as the Assassin took on more of her humanoid form.

“Let's get to it. What can _you_ teach me about being.... cute?”

Elizabeth still couldn’t quite get over that this was being asked of her, by Carmilla, of all Servants. Kiyohime, Serenity, hell, even Ushiwakamaru, sure, but her severe, mature self? The same one whose psychosis led to her attacking and killing young girls to preserve her porcelain skin and death pale glow? Cute? She'd laugh if she didn't feel like she'd be shoved right into that iron maiden of hers immediately...

“Well...” she began to fidget with her dress.

The older simply waited, silently.

Elizabeth looked up into the predatory yellow eyes of her counterpart.

“First! We gotta lose this!” She gestured wildly at Carmilla’s face.

“My... face. We have to get rid of my _face_?” She asked, incredulity second to the sharp coldness in her voice.

“Yes! This whole “grr I’m gonna eat you and suck the bones of their marrow!” look just is not gonna help you be cute! Master hates that kind of look. You know who looks at Master like that? Cu Alter. Do you wanna look like that lizard?”

Carmilla couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Interesting choice of insult, from you.”

The draconic idol scrunched her face together, cheeks puffed, tail lashing once, and fists balled at her side.

“A-ny-way!" Elizabeth continued, recovering her composure. “You have to look nice! Like me! See?” She said with bright eyes, a huge smile, then a playful wink. Her fingers made a peace sign, bordering the open eye between the splayed fingers, and her knee bent slightly towards her other leg. It was a very cliché idol pose, but one that got the point across.

“Now you try!”

Carmilla blanched. Not that it was easy to tell, as there was hardly color in her features to begin.

“I am not doing that. That’s... that’s childish! It’s immature! It’s simply ridiculous and I won’t—”

“Be cute without trying it once.” Elizabeth interjected. “I’m not saying you have to do this exact pose for Master. I’m saying you need to try it. Feel the cuteness in your body, whatever shreds there may be, and put it forward into the world!”

Carmilla swallowed. Then, after a moment, she nodded. Removing her large, stiff cape, the vampiress was left wearing... very little. The cape was usually able to offset just how little she adorned her actual body with. Now, the tall, pale vampire slowly brought her fingers near her face, the long talon-like nails crossing half of her face. Imitating the younger’s pose, she stood stock still for several seconds, the silence of the cold dark room hammering the embarrassment she felt with each thump of her heart.

The room’s murky black seemed to, very very slightly, lighten.

Elizabeth smiled.

“We have some work to do, I won’t lie. But how did that feel?”

Carmilla quickly dropped the pose, crossing her arms over her chest, a finger on her chin.

“It felt humiliating. Impish. Foolishly idiotic.”

Elizabeth’s face fell.

“But... I felt what you said to feel. It was... cute. But I’m starting to think what works for you won’t work for me at all.”

The idol arched an eyebrow.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean... look at you. Diminutive, small, petite, _short_... all of those are attributed to cute girls. I am tall, towering, intimidating, imposing... I am a _woman_ , after all, not a _girl_. How can my features possibly be used to be cute?”

Elizabeth frowned further, and tapped a pink nail against her own temple.

“That’s true. It’s hard to weaponize cuteness with these traits. But maybe... we need to go about it differently! After all, you’re not just scary! You’re cool, and mature, and sultry!”

“Yes, but we’re back at the original problem. None of those are cute. I want Master to think I’m cute.”

“What if... what if we moved the goalpost a little? Not a whole lot. But a little. We can make your coolness cute. All we really have to do... is give you a makeover!”

Carmilla blinked.

“What.”

Elizabeth giggled.

“Yeah! A makeover! Do away with the goth thing, and play up your maturity. Maybe make you look like an office lady! Master will look at you and say, “wow, Carmilla is so cool!” and her heart will beat faster as you bend down and pat her head and—”

“Get back on track.”

“Right! Sorry! But yeah, let’s try turning you from Carmilla, scary vampire lady, into Ms. Carmilla, mature businesswoman about town!”

The vampire sighed and put her hand over her face. This could only bode well.

The simulation room began to change. Now that Elizabeth had a more concrete idea, she could take over what the room would look like. First thing she was going to do, is get rid of all this dark. Time for a makeup studio.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay! School and stuff. Don't think I forgot you folks!


	4. What would Mom Do?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> E: Okay, let's ask... ooh, this is a good one!  
> C: ...Who did you think of?  
> E: Let's not give it away before the chapter!  
> C: ...The what?  
> E: (Hey audience, who wears purple, has a big sword, and loooooooves Master like crazy? ^_~)  
> C: She's talking to herself again.... what a stupid girl.

The makeup studio Elizabeth created did not last long. Carmilla was very uncooperative, and seemed in general afraid of the makeup brushes. After about an hour of trying to corral the vampire into a position where the idol could work in peace on her, she finally had to admit it was not going to happen. Defeated, she led Carmilla out of the simulation room, swearing under her breath she would try again someday, even if the older woman was asleep. But first...

“Alright alright, I’ve been trying to help, but what if... and hear me out. What if we ask some other Servants for advice? We won’t say it’s you, we’ll just say we’re asking... for a friend!”

Carmilla scowled, leering at her younger self. “Do you really think people would buy that pathetic excuse?” 

Elizabeth shrugged. “Even if they don’t they’d have to be some pretty rude Servants to point it out to your face.”

Carmilla thoughtfully stroked her chin. Carefully mulling over the potential consequences of making her desire known, even with such a flimsy handwave... or continue to suffer under her younger self’s manic approach?

“Fine. But who are we going to consult with to begin? Who would even know how to help me?”

“Well that part’s simple. We just need to find someone mature like you to help narrow down what traits in a mature woman Master finds attractive!”

Simple enough. And Elizabeth knew who first to contact. Leading Carmilla down the winding Chaldea hallways, she knocked on a door. A short moment later, a soft voice came from the other end.

“Come in~”

The two strode in. The room was candlelit, and weapons hung on the wall. At the far wall of the room a woman sat in front of a vanity, brushing her hair. The room smelled like lavender, and it felt comforting enough to almost make one fall asleep if they should so much as sit undisturbed for a moment.

Minamoto no Raikou glanced at the corner of her mirror, seeing her two guests. Her eyes conveyed the sentiment that they were not who she was expecting, but her pleasant smile welcomed them all the same.

“Oh my, it’s that girl and her adult self, correct?”

Elizabeth nodded. “Elizabeth Bathory, and Carmilla! We’re here to ask you a couple of questions about Master.”

At the mention of their shared Master, Raikou’s eyes widened and her expression was one of pure adoration. The Berserker set her brush down, and turned to face them. Due to how long and voluminous her hair was, it hadn’t been properly conveyed that she was in fact, wearing little. Her usual purple skintight battle suit was replaced with a simple purple towel. Elizabeth blushed at the thought that they had barged into her room shortly after she had bathed. Carmilla seemed nonplussed. Rather, she was thinking about how the Divine trait of the oni slayer might translate to the taste and effect of her blood. Normal vampire things.

“Ah, Master... my darling little Master. Have you seen her today? I invited her to see me after dinner, but I’m worried that she won’t come...” Raikou asked.

Carmilla shook her head.

“We haven’t seen her. However, I wanted to take this chance to ask you.. What does Master like?”

“Like? Why, Master likes her mother, I’m sure.” Raikou nodded, putting a hand to her own chest with a proud expression. “After all, she did summon me, so surely she loves me.”

Carmilla rolled her eyes. Elizabeth nudged her with her elbow. 

Clearing her throat, the idol spoke this time.

“What we mean to ask is... what does Master want... in someone they like?”

The Berserker arched an eyebrow, a skeptical expression on her face. Elizabeth had the sudden thought if they made it sound like they wanted to “steal” Master from her that surely they would be killed. After all, a dragon and a vampire were not so different from demons, the things Raikou was legendary for killing in droves. She rubbed the back of her head and clarified.

“We’re uh, asking for a friend.”

Raikou remained seated, narrowing her eyes for a moment. Then she brightened up. 

“Oh my, you came to me asking for advice on how to win Master’s affection? As her mother, I’m so flattered and honored. After all, I would know best!” she giggled. 

Elizabeth let out a nervous chuckle and nodded in agreement. “That’s right, we knew you’d be the best person to ask!” 

Carmilla wanted to die. Again. This was embarrassing on a level she previously did not know existed. 

The purple clad warrior woman brought a finger to her chin in thought. “Well, you could always do what I do...”

Carmilla spoke up. “And that is?”

“Ah, sorry! I was thinking about Master again. My precious child... Anyway, you could hold Master in a tight embrace, and press them against your bosom, so she feels your warmth, and hears your heartbeat, while you whisper to her how you’ll _always_ be there—”

Carmilla seized Elizabeth by the back of her dress.

“Thank you for your time, but we should really be going now.” She hastily cut Raikou off, and left, dragging the dragon idol behind her.

A little ways down the hall, Carmilla pinched the bridge of her nose and shook her head.

“What the hell was that?!” 

Elizabeth shrugged, confused. “I thought that was a good idea!”

Carmilla blanched. “Are you kidding me! You think mothering Master is how I want Master to see me? I said cute, not suffocating!” She held her head in her hands and groaned.

“This time, _I’ll_ find a Servant to ask. Jeez... leave it to my idiot child self to go and ask a damn _Berserker_!” She said as she stormed off.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wanna take a guess who's next? I've got a few more like this in mind before wrapping it up! Hope you guys are still having fun!


	5. The Assassin Class is really made of...!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> C: "Perverts, it seems."  
> E: "I mean, it's not that surprising."  
> C: "What makes you say that?"  
> E: ".....Have you seen a mirror lately?"  
> C: "You have five seconds to run."  
> E: "And I appreciate that. You are very fast."

Elizabeth followed  Carmilla down the hallway. The older vampire was still clearly upset with her, as it had been an hour and some minutes of pacing up and down the same hallway, without so much as a word between them. Every time the idol tried to speak up and ask her adult self what she was thinking, she was met with a simple but effective glare that threatened to pierce through her by itself. The dragon girl took the hint and simply followed behind without a word. 

After what felt like another eternity with only the sounds of their footfalls to break up the silence,  Carmilla finally stopped. She had been thinking to herself, and now it was time to share her thoughts, aloud, to “herself”.

“Berserker class Servants bring nothing but disaster with them no matter what. I wanted to ask Vlad III, but even that gentleman, as a Berserker, would be too dangerous to safely take advice from. We could ask his Lancer self, but honestly, I feel like, ironically, he’s even crazier. I’d ask a Saber but most of them are obnoxious enough that I might just kill them outright. They’d either ask for food or be clueless about the whole affair. I was thinking we could ask a Caster, but honestly I don’t know many of the Casters that live in Chaldea currently. Da Vinci, sure, but that woman is too weird to get a straight answer from. She might just invent something unnecessary and inane. That leaves one clear answer for the moment.” 

Elizabeth listened closely, as  Carmilla monologued without looking her way. If  all of those good choices (to her anyway) were ruled out, what was left?

“I’m going to ask other members of the Assassin class. As one myself I can safely say that I trust the others to not be full of tedious natures and otherwise annoying mannerisms. And at this point, I’m not even going to bother with the lame excuse we tried earlier. After all, everyone has tried to court Master before. Why should it be weird that I’m doing it?”

The draconic idol nodded, seeming in agreement. “That makes sense. You don’t have a Madness Enhancement, and I think most of the Assassins don’t either, so their judgement should surely be better!”

Carmilla rolled her eyes. “Don’t make me laugh. I ruled out the ones I knew you would have asked next.”

At this Elizabeth puffed her cheeks. “H-hey! I’ll have you know that I thought Uncle Vlad being a Berserker wouldn’t affect it, since he’s a vampire too so he knows how to charm people. The Sabers being innocent and clueless pigs means that they would know how best to appeal to  Master’s base instincts, and Da Vinci... okay, I  kinda wanted to see what she would make to help us. I thought it stood a good chance of being a helpful wild card!”

“And that is the difference between you and me. I know better than to take such stupid gambles with little chance of payoff and more than likely to just blow up in my face.”

Elizabeth pouted further. Her adult self, unaffected, strode off, down to the first Assassin she could think of. A rap on the door, and after a moment, a voice answered, sweet as honey even through the steel door.

“Come on in~!”

The door slid open, and  Carmilla entered, Elizabeth following suit. The room before them was orange lit, with lanterns hanging from the ceiling, and a bright room lamp standing tall on the corner opposite the door. A pole stood, connecting ceiling to floor, and the room was filled with sensual, jazzy music.

Mata Hari swung down from near the ceiling, spinning in place on the pole as she met her guests.

“Why, hello~  Carmilla and little Liz, right? Welcome! What brings you to my humble studio?” she asked as she gracefully removed herself from the pole, cartwheeling toward where they stood. Elizabeth was flustered by the dancer’s movements, whereas the vampire was intrigued, but remained stoic. 

“Mata Hari. I come with a question to ask you. As someone who knows how to...” she cleared her throat. “Charm people, Servant or otherwise, I must ask... do you know the ideal way to...” she began to trail off, her words getting stuck in her throat. 

“To...?” the stripper asked with a tilt of the head. “ Carmilla , is there someone you want to attract? And you came to me? Oh goodie! Can I guess who it is? Is it that  Hijikata guy? He’s got that bloodlust to him, too!”

Carmilla scoffed. “No! I like that about him, but hardly enough to want his attention. I want to know how to charm Master! How to be cute for someone like that.”

Elizabeth seemed surprised by the upfront nature of  Carmilla’s reply. She didn’t care about covering up her quest anymore? Mata Hari blinked. “Master! Well, don’t we have some high goal!” she clasped her hands together excitedly, the jewelry on her wrists jingling together with the motion. “I think I can help with that. I can teach you a few techniques to get their blood boiling in no time at all, and their hands all over you~”

Carmilla blushed, visibly painting her pale cheeks red. Elizabeth was equally appalled. 

“I... well, you see, I don’t quite need...” the vampire began to stammer. 

“Now  now , you don’t need to be shy around me. I’ve seen it all~” Mata Hari said with a wink and a wag of her finger before approaching the pole again. Wrapping a hand around it, she began to walk around the pole, slowly bringing one leg up toward the air before the other kicked off, sending the woman spinning around the pole with one leg out. She brought one arm towards the floor, tilting her head back as she spun with a laugh. 

“This is one of the  most simple , but effective, moves you can use! It’s easy to learn and it shows off your flexibility and features very quickly~” She said, all while maintaining her rotation and position.  Carmilla was a bright red at this point. She was...  incited, but had to compartmentalize it away. As attractive as the woman was, this was not what she was here for. But.... what was stopping her from getting a snack for all her efforts?

Elizabeth. The idol grabbed  Carmilla’s wrist and yanked her toward the door. With a polite bow, she shouted behind her, “Thank you, but we’ll try that another time!” before the door closed, leaving Mata Hari by herself. The stripper was mildly confused, but simply shrugged, before beginning to practice her set again.

Elizabeth panted, feeling like she just got out of seeing something bad.  Carmilla leered at her younger self. 

“You could have waited outside, you know. I wouldn’t have been there long anyway. Just a bite and on my way.”

“You’re not  _ supposed _ to bite the other Servants!” Elizabeth yelled, frustratedly kicking her heel against the floor. 

Carmilla sighed. “Well, whatever. Let’s ask the next Servant I had in mind.” With that, she walked off until she got to a door, and knocked. A soft voice, yet somehow sounding like it was right next to her ear, replied.

“Come... inside~”

The doors slid open, and the two entered. The smell of alcohol almost immediately filled their noses before they even fully entered, and in the middle of the room, on a large, comfortable couch, the oni Shuten Douji lay, sprawled out, jacket open and not much else on her pale-gray body. 

“Hello...~” she sighed, her breathing heavy and her eyes unfocused. 

Elizabeth simply looked at  Carmilla with confusion, and mild fear. 

Carmilla replied. “Shuten Douji, I need your advice. To be succinct, since you’re already plenty drunk, I need to get Master’s attention and show her I’m cute. How do I do that?”

Elizabeth, again, was shocked. For  Carmilla to discard her pride and stop caring about hiding her cuteness desire, she must be getting desperate with all these unsatisfying answers.

Meanwhile, Shuten seeemed to be asleep, but just as the vampire moved to nudge her with her staff, the oni spoke. “That’s easy... aah, just drink with them until they’re under the table, and then show them what you have to offer.”  Shuten giggled.  Carmilla was less than amused by this prospect. 

“I’m not going to take advantage of Master, you demon.”

“Ah well...” the  oni airily replied. “Then, in that case, take them to a hot spring. You could just... lay yourself bare before them and see what happens.”

Carmilla put her face in her palm. This was a bust too. 

“Incorrigible oni. Thank you, but I’ll not be using your advice.”

Shuten simply laughed, gave a very limp wave, and began to mumble to herself while taking a long swig from a gourd at her side. 

The two guests left without another word.

Elizabeth shook her head.

“ _ T _ _ hat _ was supposed to be a better choice than, say,  Raikou ?”

“I didn’t think she would be drunk at this time of day.” Carmilla growled.

“She’s  _ always _ that drunk, at  _ any _ time of day! That’s literally all  Shuten does!”

Carmilla sighed. It was true, but she had hoped the  oni would have better advice than “get Master drunk”. She usually seemed so good at manipulating her fellow  oni , Ibaraki, or the Berserker (and sometimes Rider) Sakata  Kintoki . So why was she so useless back there? 

The vampire shook her head, and simply went to the doors of the next Servants in mind.

“You could threaten Master at knifepoint,  fufufu ... or maybe pin them against the wall when they’re all alone?” Jing  Ke said.

“Sneak into Master’s room and hold them close when they’re asleep~” Hassan Serenity smiled.

“Guard Master’s door at all times and never leave that door. Your loyalty will be proof enough.” Sasaki  Kojirou nodded sagely. 

“Carve up Mommy and nuzzle up inside her!” Jack the Ripper said, even though  Carmilla never knocked on the child’s door.

Door after door, Servant after Servant, it went. Carmilla reached the end of her mental list and finally threw her hands up in frustration.

“I don’t  _ get it! _ Why does no one, not a single soul in Chaldea, have a good idea for me?!” she was practically fuming.

Elizabeth sighed sympathetically for her counterpart. “Listen. I have an idea. But before I do it, I need to know you trust me.”

Carmilla glared warily at her younger self.

“I’m starting to feel like I don’t have a choice anymore. It’s going to have to be one of us because we seem to the  _ only sensible Servants _ here!” She let out a frustrated groan, rubbing her temples. 

Elizabeth nodded. “Ok then. I need to get in contact with someone. I forgot where the room is, and I  wanna message them for directions. And uh, you never gave me back my phone...”

Carmilla blinked, mildly confused, before remembering she in fact, did not return the phone. “Oh. Right, here.” She said, taking the device from within her cape and handing it over to her younger self.

She took the phone and typed quickly. “Thanks. And remember, I’m on your side, okay?”

“ Of course you are. Why would you even need to say that?”  Carmilla stared at Elizabeth with a quizzical look. “Who are you even messaging?”

“Oh. Um, no one. It’s just Kiyohime.”

Carmilla’s eyes practically popped out of her head. “Absolutely not! That dragon is more insane than anyone else here! Give me that!” She swiped the phone out of her hand and looked at the screen. 

“........”

The phone fell from  Carmilla’s grip, falling to the floor. She was as white as a sheet, and almost as transparent. Her eyes were wide, abject shock and horror in her pupils. Her body almost went limp, and she slumped against the wall, a single word escaping her lips as a gasp, as though one stabbed.

“No....”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah this one was sort of a chimera of chapter ideas I had but didn't satisfy me on an individual level, so I turned it into a romcom style montage. Figured the pacing could be faster too so two birds one chapter. Next up, the exciting conclusion! Will Carmilla get the answer she wants? Will all the Servants stop trying to get her outright laid? and Who Was Phone?? find out next time on F/GO Z!


	6. Bond

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> E: Ooh? Here comes _______!  
> C: Please, do be quiet...  
> ???: Whoa, where am I?  
> E: The chapter summary box, of course!  
> ???: The what now?  
> C: *sigh*

Elizabeth had her lance out, ready to protect herself. A lot of good that would do, considering who she was up against. No type advantage to speak of, but the uncharacteristic rage with which Carmilla was enveloped seemed to give her a very noticeable spike in her attack power.  

“N-now, Carmilla, I told you, I’m on your side here. You gotta trust me, you know?!” 

Carmilla was seeing red, more than usual. And none of it was the blood that she craved. She was about to fix that. Killing her younger self... she had always fantasized about it, but now, now there was an opportunity and there was nothing, and nobody, who could stop her! Even if the genius inventor Da Vinci showed up with her affinity bonus, she wouldn’t be denied killing Bathory first. 

This seething hatred and desire for one’s blood manifested in the growing darkness that Elizabeth didn’t initially notice was blanketing the two of them. She heard the unmistakable sound of metal groaning open, chains snapping, and the rush of something coming up behind her very fast. Her eyes shut tight, she didn’t want the end to come already...! 

The noblewoman grinned, hungrily gazing at her victim. “Blood, blood, blood...!” Carmilla’s voice was but a sultry growl now, her refined tone a mere mask for the violent creature that lay beneath as she began to recite her Noble Phantasm’s call. “Eternal beauty... the immortal feast, horrid age will only find me at the end of time... PHANTOM MAI—” 

“STOP!” came another voice, and a flash of red cut through the darkness. Carmilla’s eyes popped open wide, and her posture became rigid, even more than a normal noble’s. She looked... immobile, as though she was bound by some force unseen. The pitch parted, almost immediately, like a cloud broken by a plane. When the shadows withdrew, and Elizabeth opened one eye, then the other, she found herself looking straight at her unexpected savior. 

“M-M-Master!” the idol cried out, a heavy sigh of relief on her lips. 

Humanity’s savior, Chaldea’s last Master, whatever myriad of names she was called... the orange haired girl’s hand was glowing, a firm expression on her face. The power of her Command Seals stayed Carmilla’s own murderous one.  

The girl garbed in the standard Chaldea Mystic Code looked slowly from Elizabeth to Carmilla. Upon seeing the pale vampire, Fujimaru Ritsuka smiled girlishly. 

“Carmilla, please stop trying to kill Liz, okay?” she asked in a kind voice, eliciting a small look of surprise from the Servant. 

“Master...!” having finally regained the ability to move, Carmilla turned away, lest her Master see her appear... vulnerable. 

Elizabeth skipped over to Ritsuka’s side, giggling. “Thank goodness you came. Another second and I wouldn’t be dragon steak, I’d be a dragon _skewer_!” 

Ritsuka simply bent forward and gave the pink haired girl a few pats on the head.  

“You did good, Liz. Thank you. Now you can go. I need to have a word with Carmilla, alone.” 

Elizabeth nodded, then looked over to Carmilla. 

“Don’t screw up!” she said with a laugh, then started to walk off. Carmilla turned to retort, but just as she did, the Lancer girl simply offered a big grin, a wink, and a quick jab of her head toward their Master. A brief “okay” hand sign was flashed, and after that, the girl turned and skipped down the hallway, singing to herself. Everyone else could still hear her as though she were singing loudly. Such was the curse of the idol with sonic dragon breath. 

Ritsuka approached Carmilla slowly. Not for fear of the vampire, but rather consideration of the haughty woman’s established boundaries.  

“Hey. Walk with me, talk with me?” she asked hopefully. Carmilla simply closed her eyes and scoffed, ever the cool and aloof one. 

“Hmph. Very well. Lead the way, Master.” 

Ritsuka nodded, and began to walk down the hall, Servant following just behind her. It was quiet for several moments, save for the Master’s footfalls and Carmilla’s heels clacking. Finally, Ritsuka spoke up. 

“I got an interesting message from Elizabeth earlier.” she said, sounding amused as she held up her phone. Carmilla could make out her younger self’s message on the screen. 

“Hey Master, you wouldn’t believe what I just caught!” 

And underneath, the photo Elizabeth had stolen while Carmilla was asleep.  

The vampire let out a soft hiss. Ritsuka stopped walking. It took effort for the pale woman to not collide with the back of her Master. 

“...I don’t know what to say. I didn’t let her take that photo. She crept in while I was asleep and—” 

Ritsuka whirled around and put a finger to her Servant’s lips. The noblewoman was both confused and flustered at the contact.  

“I’m glad she sent it to me. And I’m glad I immediately went to look for you two. It’d be bad for farming if you up and killed Liz, you know?” she said, trying to sound severe, but only ending up laughing by the end of her sentence. 

“I’m kidding. Not really but like, please don’t kill Liz. What I mean is... I am glad she took this photo. Even though it’s kind of wrong to sneak in to people’s rooms and snap pictures of them asleep...” Carmilla nodded in agreement. “This picture _is_ really cute. But what were you doing with Liz's bear?” She chuckled. Carmilla stopped nodding. She tilted her chin upward, trying to regain her noble disposition and act cool. 

“Now now...” Ritsuka gently spoke, slowly brushing her fingers against Carmilla’s. With an encouraging smile, she spoke in barely above a whisper, as though an intimate secret was being shared.  

“You don’t have to act so regal all the time, as much as I love that about you. I... I want to see another side of you. I want to see you be cute and blush. I want to see you be... yourself. Wholly yourself, without reservation or fear of judgement. I know you might not think so, but the only real difference between you and Liz, is you’re more mature. I can’t even say Class difference cause, come Halloween, who knows what she’ll end up as.” Ritsuka let out a giggle. 

Carmilla stared down at her Master, golden eyes harsh and cold. Being compared to her younger self was always aggravating. However, her Master had a point. If even in front of the one woman who she wanted for more than just her blood... she couldn't be herself, then who? Who would ever accept Carmilla for all she was, if Ritsuka didn't?

A deep sigh came from the woman, and she turned her softened gaze downward at Ritsuka. This girl... her contractor. The one who stopped the Incineration of Humanity. The one who has done her best to be the stalwart defender of the planet and all its people. The Master of Chaldea that has gone through a dozen hells in a dozen timelines and for what? To do her best...? Yet this girl... Ritsuka... has shown nothing less than herself, each time, with everyone she has ever come across. She didn't wear her heart on her sleeve, she stuck it to her face!

Contrast the vampire. Self isolated. Sheltered away from the world. Cunning, manipulation and deception to secure power, desire, selfishly claim another life to remain beautiful... killing and ultimately dying alone and full of heartache.  

“Master...” Carmilla began to speak before her mind would allow her to stop herself. “Won’t you... touch me?” her face, almost always a mask of pure alabaster, began to glow with a pink hue for the first time that Ritsuka ever saw. The vampire’s gaze shifted slightly away from her Master, her expression completely unrecognizable from what everyone else knew to be. Here she stood, the proud, noble woman, now wearing an expression of girlish uncertainty. She could hear her own heart beating within her chest like a war drum! She could feel her fingers reaching out, long nails searching for her Master's hand. This was the height of her bond with Ritsuka. Only one person could make her feel this way, vulnerable, longing... praying she wasn't wrong.

Ritsuka Fujimaru slowly intertwined her fingers with Carmilla’s. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I'm sorry if the ending is a little anticlimatic. I basically knew two things: how this was gonna be set up, and how this was gonna end. The middle was written by the seat of my pants. If you enjoyed this, please, let me know. It's my first time doing a multi chapter work and honestly it was a lot of fun but I definitely have a lot of work to do if I want to do more like this (and inspiration, I need a lot of that).
> 
> Ah, before I go, no writer is complete without their muses. So allow my fine actresses to take their bows, and let's meet again!
> 
> Elizabeth: To all of my little piggies out there, thank you for your support! I hope you had fun; I sure did! Come to my conce—  
> Carmilla: All of you readers, thank you. I hope your time here was pleasant and enjoyable. Perhaps I shall star in something else down the road, and if that should happen, I hope for your support there as well. Until next time...  
> Both: GOODBYE!


End file.
